By Evelyn Lim
1. Fall in love with yourself. Think about what makes you You. Just like a flower that needs watering to grow, learn to nurture yourself in every way. Love yourself for all the good that you see and accept your flaws and the fact that you are imperfect. This does not mean that you do not learn to change from your shortcomings; instead, you are being gentle and kind to yourself despite all your “flaws”. Look in the mirror and fall in love with the reflection that is You.
“To love oneself is the beginning of a life-long romance.”
Oscar Wilde quotes (Irish Poet, Novelist, Dramatist and Critic, 1854-1900)
2. Eliminate Self Criticism. Do you often berate yourself over the tiniest thing? Is there a little voice inside your head that often tells you that you are no good because you are stupid or make mistakes. If you find that you criticize yourself often, make an effort to stop the self criticism.
“I CAN is 100 times more important than IQ.” — unknown
3. Be Kind And Positive. When you start to think kindly and positively about yourself, the love you have for yourself just grows. Make it a habit to praise yourself everyday, while in the front of the mirror. Because of such thoughts, you naturally undertake empowering actions that support your development.
4. Acknowledge Your Effort. It is not always about winning or coming up tops in everything that you do. Many times, it is the effort that counts! Acknowledge that you have done your best, even if you have failed to produce tangible results.
5. Let Go Of Worry. Loving yourself requires you to let go of your worry. It is a horrible way to live a life filled with constant worrying. I can attest to that! Worry does not help in any way. It cannot, on its own, make things happen. Only wise actions can! So instead of worrying, spend time thinking about what you can do to help in the situation. If the situation is beyond your control, then make a request to the Universe/God about what you want. Next, surrender your outcome.
“There is only one way to happiness and that is to cease worrying about things which are beyond the power of our will.” — Epictetus quotes (Greek philosopher associated with the Stoics, AD 55-c.135)
6. Trust Yourself. Have confidence in your abilities. Know that you have the ability to make important changes for yourself, for as long as you put your heart to it. You can also support yourself by visualizing desired outcomes.
“Trust yourself. You know more than you think you do.”
Benjamin Spock quotes (American Pediatrician and Author, 1903-1998)
7. Forgive Yourself. If you have made mistakes in the past that had caused you to feel less worthy, then you need to forgive yourself. All of us make mistakes; so there really is no need to beat yourself up over them. Also, if you have been carrying around a baggage of emotional hurt because of a childhood trauma, learn to forgive yourself.
“To forgive is to set a prisoner free and discover that the prisoner was you.”
Lewis B. Smedes quotes
8. Be Truthful To Yourself. Loving yourself requires you to be truthful about your own feelings. If you are happy, acknowledge the joy. If you are sad, acknowledge the sorrow. When you are truthful about your feelings, you do not try to lie to yourself or seek to bury your negative emotions. Instead, acknowledging what you feel provides a good guide to what your thoughts are. And as we all know, thoughts can be changed, so that healing and self growth can take place.
9. Grow Spiritually. When you spend time growing spiritually, loving yourself becomes automatic. You become more peaceful, connected, kind, loving and compassionate. You nurture a mind that grows more beautiful by the day. You naturally love yourself in the process.
10. Make Positive Affirmations Everyday. Reframe your mind with positive affirmations. For instance, say this to yourself “I love and accept myself completely and unconditionally.” Read your affirmations out loud several times a day.
11. Express Gratitude. Express gratitude for the person that you are. For instance, cultivate an appreciation for your strengths and gifts. Also, feel a sense of gratitude that you are alive and well, and fully capable of making a difference in your life.
12. Nurture Your Dreams. Why deny yourself your dreams? When you nurture your dreams, you would love the life that you are leading. Every moment that you live is a joy because you are expressing yourself fully.
Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn’t do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover. —Mark Twain
13. Boost Your Self Confidence. Make a deliberate attempt to look for opportunities that can help improve your confidence. For instance, if you are particularly good at doing something, set aside more time to indulge and improve your skills on it. Knowing that you have particular gifts can boost your self esteem.
14. Relax. Give yourself space to take breaks every now and then. If you spend your time working, without paying attention to your health, it also means that you do not love yourself well enough to take care of your own body. Fill your time with silence, soothing music and visions of beauty; anything that nourishes your Soul.
15. Have Fun. Inject some fun into your life. Life is meant to be an enjoyable. Don’t take life or yourself too seriously. If you can think of life in this manner, you automatically relax and quit worrying over things that do not matter.
16. Look After Your Body. It is important that you strengthen yourself with proper nutrition and regular exercise. Your body is a temple and you should treat it with respect, love and care. It has been found that the lack of self love is often the root causes of conditions like eating disorders, obesity or even terminal diseases.
“Take care of your body. It’s the only place you have to live.”
Jim Rohn quotes (American Speaker and Author. He is famous for motivational audio programs for Business and Life. )
17. Learn To See Beauty. When you learn to see beauty in every thing, you will also see beauty in yourself. Hence, stop to smell the flowers. Notice everything. Feel everything. The pink blush of the flowers in your garden, the greenness of the plains, the whisper of the gentle wind, or the myriad hues of an evening sky.
About life coach, author Evelyn Lim: LINK
Cycle 38,000 KM around the world for mental health only to be censored at the end of it
November 13, 2011 in Commentary | by J Peachy | 2 comments
As you may or may not know I am an occupier in the occupyvancouver (OV) movement. Vancouver is one of the over 1000 cities across the globe; we are a connected people who want to make a change for the betterment of all. I am there personally for two reasons 1) Wild Salmon and 2) Mental Health. I am also active in the Media committee and thus try to take on projects that advocate for these two issues.
As part of the radio show, I have been interviewing Michael Schratter (ridedonthide.com) on a regular basis, he has been cycling the world for mental health. Michael started his 40,000 km journey departing from the Vancouver Art Gallery on August 1, 2010. I have done numerous live telephone interviews with him particularly when he was in Central and South America and then on his final leg in Canada over the past few months. I, as well as other guests who have been on my show have been inspired by Michael’s journey and appreciated his candor through the conversations we had.
On Saturday November 12th Michael completed his 38,000 km journey around the world in Vancouver. Being a part of the occupyvancouver community I thought it would be a good opportunity for him to ride into the art gallery, symbolically completing his ride where he started and to address and inspire the people there. The plan was for Michael to arrive on Saturday November 12th at 3:30 pm, after his arrival event at GM Place earlier in the day. I arranged with the OV programming committee to make sure they could accomodate on the schedule. Earle Peach who is part of a band called Illiteraty, that plays frequently in the downtown eastside and is very aware of the mental health issues within that community had conveniently been on the schedule as well right after Michael’s planned arrival.
Having been onsite for the better part of four weeks I have seen the mental health and addiction issues first hand. Whether it is interpersonal conflict, random psychotic or manic outbursts in meetings or dealing with suffering and death due to drugs and alcohol, it has open my eyes and educated me on issues I only read about. However, what has inspired me is a caring community of people that has accepted people as humans and try to work on strategies in a non judgemental way to include everyone in the conversations. I have been on stage a number of times announcing that I am a mental health advocate, and people in the occupy community have come up to me to share their stories in private. Yes, the stigma still exists even within a supportive and caring community.
On Saturday November 12th at 2:41 pm I received a voicemail from Michael stating that he was not allowed to go to occupyvancouver. Here is a transcript of that message.
“Hey Jay I was told explicitly unfortunately I’m not allowed to at this point in time to go to occupyvancouver we dont have to get into details as to why, its controversial. You know as a left wing socialist I believe in everything that is going on there, I was reminded that I did sign a contract and that exists for two years and no one is interested in having sponsors take a financial risk or a branding risk with the ride dont hide campaign and in anyway feel uncomfortable. You know what I’m saying its unfortunate and embarrassing but that is the way it is. Im going to send you a text to have you to go to voice mail this message. Once again I apologize and I know you have extended yourself far further than you needed to make the offer, I really appreciate I look forward to working on your radio show anytime you want.” - Michael Schratter
Naturally, I was angered by this message, I was more than livid, I took it personally but then eventually, sadly not surprised. I blamed myself for putting Michael and myself in this situation. I thought; I should know what corporate influence is all about, I lived in that space in a past life and it almost killed me. After hearing Michael’s message my Bipolar mind was racing wildly through the scenarios on how I would retaliate; my ego and the cause for the greater good was in serious conflict. I was an emotional minefield waiting to explode on the next random person I was to come across, I was scared of this possibility. I had a conversation with a friend who helped me process the logic, it was kind of like trying to read a firefighters manual in the middle of a raging inferno, she tried her best.
At 3:30 pm I had no other option than to break the news on stage to the occupyvancouver community and explain the reasons why Michael could not make it. Being that there was a downpour there were only a few dozen in the camp that likely heard me. However, when I did explain it, people were in shock, they were saddened but seemingly not surprised. Many came to the conclusion that Michael was censored, they don’t blame him personally. However, being that the occupy movement is about changing the system of inequity through challenging the centralized powers of authority that affect the masses, the outcome in retrospect was predictable. It says even within social causes there is the 1% who prioritize the corporate interests and profit that support them vs facing the risk in the pursuit of the right thing to do. I even recall David Suzuki who presented at occupyvancouver a few weeks back where he read a disclaimer before his speech and stated he spoke only for himself and not his foundation (that bears his own name) or any entities associated with him. Was David Suzuki trying to capture back some freedom of expression?
I am saddened by the lost opportunity that the Ride Don’t Hide people squandered. However the reasons why I am there and the advocacy projects that I believe in do not change, and I am willing to collaborate with any free thinking individual. That being said, I have to remind myself daily I am just one voice in the 99%.
- J Peachy
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